I'd apologize, but I'm not sorry
by if-llamas-could-fly
Summary: 'And no, Dean was so not thinking about how perfect Sam looked with Gabriel pressed up next to her and an adorable baby cradled in her arms.' Sabriel, with a dash of Fem!Sam and a side helping of Destiel. Slight aftertaste of angst will also be found in later chapters.
1. Original

**A/N So... I've been wanting to write a Sabriel fic for a while now, and I ****_really_**** wanted to give them a kid, but I ****_so_**** did ****_not_**** want to get into the whole 'm-preg' shtick, so I just... sorta... made Sam a woman. Obviously, it's an AU, based in season 8, but let's just ignore the trials for now, okay? Also, if you guys like it, then I'll expand this from a one-shot into a multi-chap that covers random stuff that happens ****_before, during _****and ****_after_**** this story. So, yeah, that's about it. Enjoy the fluff! :) **_~Sammy_

* * *

A flutter of wings and the coughing out of a mouthful of beer.

"Dean."

"Gabriel."

"Where's Sam?"

"Asleep in the library with Cas-"

"Yeah, okay, thanks."

A chair scraping back and a man getting to his feet.

"Gabriel, wait. I'd- well, I'd be careful if I were you."

"Listen Dean-o, we've been over this. I hurt Sam, and you deep-fry me in holy oil. I know the drill."

"As much as that still applies, that's not what I'm talking about. It looks like Sam's finally got those mood swings that everybody talks about. Just... try not to set Sammy off, okay?"

"Aye-aye captain."

Dean rolled his eyes and pulled a long drag of his beer, watching as the short angel raised a finger to his lips and tiptoed dramatically over to the library. The young hunter almost choked on his beer, _again_, when Castiel suddenly appeared in front of him. The angel took in the image that Dean presented, what with the desperate gasping and his face a bright red, and he frowned.

"Are you alright Dean? Do you require assistance?"

"No, I'm good. You just caught me by surprise."

"Oh. I apologize."

"It's fine Cas. Why're you here anyway? Did Gabriel kick you out?"

"Yes, actually. He said something about a bomb disposal crew arriving, and told me to come to you. I don't understand. I do not sense any unwanted explosive devices in the bunker."

Did Dean find Castiel's confused frown to be the most adorable thing ever? Yes, but he'd be damned if he ever let anybody find out. Still, he had to admit that Gabriel was a _little_ entertaining. Or, he _would_, if Dean could just get past the fact that Gabriel had knocked up his little sister.

* * *

"Heya Sammich."

Sam looked up from the book her nose was buried in, and her face split into a grin.

"Hey Gabe. Dean didn't try to throttle you again did he?"

"Not today, he didn't."

She pushed the dust tome away as Gabriel made his way towards her. Gabriel kissed the top of her head, something he could only do when she was sitting down, much to his chagrin.

("Not to be a_ chauvinist_; but _I'm_ the guy! Well, actually, I don't have a fixed gender but... my _vessel_ is a guy! Shouldn't _I _be the taller one?" Laughter. "It's only an inch Gabe." A pout. "It's a pretty big inch.")

Gabriel pulled Sam up to her feet and looped an arm around her waist. "C'mon Sammy, enough research for now. You need to rest."

Sam huffed and tried to pull away. "I'm fine Gabe. Besides, I _have_ to do this research. Dean's found a case up in Montana and-"

"You're _not_ going there. Hunting is _so_ _not_ on your to-do list."

Sam snorted. "Yeah, like Dean's gonna let me help _now_. I used to think he mother-henned _before_. Hah. He's been on full time 'protect-Sammy' mode ever since he found out. I literally had to kick his ass into taking up this hunt. I'm just finishing up the research now."

Gabriel mentally bumped up his opinion of Dean and made a note to thank the hunter later. "Well, Dean's right. You are _not_ hunting like this. And you aren't doing any more research either."

"Gabe-"

"Nope. No arguing. The only thing I'm letting you do now is take a nap. _I'll_ do the research."

Sam raised an eyebrow at her angel. "_You? _Doing _research_?"

"_Hey!_ I can do research."

Sam sighed in exasperation, but let Gabriel pull her towards the plush couch that was tucked away in a corner of the library. Dean had found it somewhere in the depths of the bunker, and he had dragged it over to the library in the hopes that Sam would at least _attempt_ to not hunch over the table when she was reading. Gabriel sat down at one end of the couch, and he pulled Sam down so that her head rested in his lap. He threaded his fingers through her long hair, messing up the soft brown locks. Sam hummed contentedly and within seconds her eyes slid shut and her breathing evened out.

Gabriel rested his hands on Sam's stomach and let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. He could feel the tiny spark of Life thrumming beneath his fingertips, could feel the tiny heartbeats thumping away softly. He grinned and let his Grace wash over Sam's sleeping form.

Dean found a pile of research notes on his bed. There was a bag of peanut M'n'Ms next to it.

* * *

The morning peace in the bunker was shattered by a groan and loud yell that echoed off the walls. "_GABRIEL GET YOUR SORRY ASS DOWN HERE!"_

"_Goddamn it Gabriel!"_

Dean really had to put bells on their angels. He'd been caught off guard again, this time choking on scalding coffee and shooting glares at Gabriel, who had popped up right in front of him. Gabriel, for his own part, looked completely disheveled. His normally slicked back hair was in a disarray. His hands were trembling, and he licked his lips nervously. Dean would've taken pity on him, if only he could concentrate on anything other than the burn in his throat. Castiel leaned forward from his perch on a chair across the table from Dean, and he gently pressed his fingertips to the hunter's neck, whisking away the pain.

Dean grabbed Castiel's hand, and held on, giving his own angel a grateful smile, before turning the flustered Archangel standing in his kitchen. "What's up Gabriel? Why'd Sammy call you?"

Gabriel just looked at Dean with a haunted look in his eyes, and said, in complete seriousness, "Dean, for your own sake, don't _ever_ do _anything_ to piss off your sister."

"Uh... Gabriel, what did you do?"

"I may have just..."

Dean heard a groan from Sam's room again, and his apprehension gave way to worry, which in turn gave way to anger. "What. Did. You. Do. To. My. Sister?"

Gabriel backed away as Dean rose from his chair and stalked over to the archangel. Castiel stood up too, and he put a restraining hand on Dean's shoulder. "Dean. Sam is fine. She is just rather frustrated with the whole situation, and now she is angry with Gabriel."

Dean turned on Gabriel once again. "Alright feathers. What'd you do to Sammy?"

"Who said that _I've_ done something?"

Dean just raised an incredulous eyebrow, and Gabriel grimaced, uncharacteristically nervous. "Okay so, I _might_ have... accidentally... passed on my sugar addiction to the baby."

Silence prevailed in the kitchen for a few indecisive moments, before Dean finally broke into laughter. "Seriously_?_ _That's_ what's got Sam so bitchy? Chocolate cravings?"

Frustration flitted across Gabriel's face, and Castiel decided to speak up before his hunter was backhanded into a wall. "Dean, this is serious. Sam is craving chocolate like she craved demon-blood. Of course, chocolate is less harmful, and much less likely to start an apocalypse, so I suppose that the analogy is rather inaccurate. Perhaps what Sam is experiencing is rather more like a drowning man needing air, or a fish needing water, or a bee needing-"

"Yeah, okay, I got it Cas. Sam _really_ needs sugar."

Gabriel nodded, and then cringed as another yell resounded within the bunker. "GABRIEL I KNOW YOU'RE HERE. GET OVER HERE _RIGHT NOW_. _And bring me some candy!_"

Gabriel paled and fear was painted across his face. "Seriously Dean. Be careful. I've dated Kali, and I can personally vouch that the Goddess of Destruction has got _nothing_ on a pissed off Sam Winchester."

"_GABRIEL_!"

Gabriel winked at a shell-shocked Dean and the bewildered angel standing next to him. He snapped his fingers, hoisted up the basket of candy that had materialized, and disappeared amongst a flutter of wings, leaving behind nothing but a faint whiff of peppermint.

* * *

Sam had a book propped open in front of her, but she paid it no attention, instead watching as Dean and Cas danced around each other in the kitchen. It turned out that Castiel was quite a good cook, once he figured out how to work the kitchen appliances. Dean had been ecstatic when he found out, dragging his angel into his kitchen as often as he could, the two of them chopping, slicing and frying in perfect harmony. Sam loved watching them cook, it was like watching a beautifully choreographed dance.

Gabriel appeared in the chair next to Sam, grinning, and she didn't even bat an eyelid. She'd grown used to seeing her angel pop up out of nowhere. A lollipop was placed between Gabriel's teeth and Sam eyed it, a smirk on her lips. She quickly reached up, pulled the lollipop out of Gabriel's mouth, and stuck it in her own. Gabriel's eyes widened as he simply stared at her. Sam smiled as innocently as she could, before winking cheekily. Gabriel's grin widened.

Dean looked up to see a lollipop discarded on the table, and Gabriel making out with Sam as passionately as possible, the couple's hands resting on the bulge that was Sam's abdomen. Dean groaned. "Oh come _on_. I do _not_ want to see my sister kissing an angel in my kitchen."

Gabriel pulled away from Sam and raised an eyebrow at the elder Winchester. "So, we're not allowed to kiss in the kitchen, but you and Cas are allowed to eye-fuck each other wherever you please?"

Castiel's cheeks flushed crimson and Dean scowled and turned away, grumbling under his breath. Something about _douche-bag angels and knocked-up little sisters_.

Sam couldn't help but laugh.

* * *

The Bat-cave was designed for a great many things, but one of the things it _wasn't_ prepared for, was a woman in labour.

But that's what the angels were for.

"_AAARGH!"_

"It's okay... you're okay Sammy. You're doing great... just breathe through it... you're doing awesome Sam..."

"Cas just _GET HIM THE HELL OUT OF HERE!"_

Castiel nodded, his blue eyes wide, and he pulled a nervously-rambling Dean away from a heaving Sam. Dean opened his mouth to protest, but both Castiel and Gabriel simultaneously shook their heads. "Don't."

Comprehension dawned as understanding flickered across Dean's face. The hunter turned to look at Sam again. "Just call me if you need me, okay Sammy? Tell Cas to come get me."

Sam nodded quickly, and Castiel put a hand on Dean's shoulder before disappearing, the hunter in tow. Gabriel held Sam's right hand over his vessel's heart, pouring as much Grace as he dared into that spot. The warmth of his Grace calmed Sam down enough to stop her from yelling, but still she whimpered. Gabriel was almost overwhelmed, but he fought to stay calm. "What do you need Sam? Just... tell me what you need, and I'll give it to you."

Sam wrapped her free hand around Gabriel's and she smiled. "Just you is enough. And maybe an angel-mojo induced epidural."

Gabriel laughed, even as he worked at pushing Sam's pain away with his Grace. Sam shot him a grateful smile and rubbed a hand across her round stomach. "All these years of hunting injuries, and none of them even come _close_ to this. Who knew that archangel-fetuses were more dangerous than vampires?"

Gabriel huffed. "Not funny Sam."

Sam stuck her tongue out. "It's a _little_ funny."

Then Sam gasped and looked at Gabriel with wide eyes. "Baby's coming. Like, _now_."

"Oh shit. _Cas!_"

Castiel appeared and his eyes widened when he saw Sam hunched over on the bed, Gabriel desperately trying to keep her calm. Gabriel turned to Castiel. "Little help here, Cassy?"

Castiel just strode forward and placed a hand on Sam's abdomen before meeting Gabriel's gaze. A short nod from the trickster, and the two angels pushed with their Grace.

* * *

Dean paced back and forth, having covered the length of the library a couple dozen times already. He ran his hands through his cropped hair, and resisted the urge to punch something. He wasn't sure what he liked less, the yelling and commotion, or the complete silence that now pervaded through the bunker.

Castiel appeared amongst a flutter of wings, and Dean practically pounced on him. What happened, is Sammy okay? Is the baby okay? Why's it so quiet, what's-"

Castiel put a hand on his hunter's shoulder and effectively silenced him. "Dean. Calm down. Sam is fine, and so is the baby. You should see her, she is beautiful."

"_She_? You mean-"

A smile broke onto Castiel's normally stoic face. "Yes. It's a girl."

Another flutter of Castiel's wings, and Dean found himself in Sam's room. His little sister was stretched out on the bed, passed out. Gabriel was sitting on the edge of the bed, a tiny little bundle cradled in his arms. A small smile turned up the corners of the archangel's mouth, no trace of the defensive smirk that was his usual fallback expression. Dean took a couple of step forward, and Gabriel looked up, his smile widening. He shifted the small bundle , handling it like it was the most precious thing in existence. Dean could feel a grin twisting his lips when he caught sight of the object of Gabriel's obvious devotion. A tiny round face, with rosy cheeks and soft brown curls looked up at Dean. Amber eyes peeked out shyly from underneath long lashes, and Dean knew he was a goner.

"She's gorgeous."

Sam opened one eye at Dean's words, and she smirked. "Yeah, she is. Thank God she didn't take after her uncle."

Dean crossed his arms and huffed. "Shut up Sammy. I'm a hot piece of ass. Right, Cas?"

Castiel was a bright scarlet and Sam snickered, causing Gabriel to laugh as well. Dean put a reassuring hand on Castiel's shoulder, and tried to glare at Sam, but the smile on his face ruined his efforts.

A soft gurgling sound, however, silenced everybody in the room. All eyes turned to look at the infant who was squirming in Gabriel's arms, smiling a toothless smile, and _laughing. _It was a beautiful sight to behold, a surge of love and adoration filling the hearts of everybody present. Sam reached out and Gabriel immediately placed their daughter in her arms. The baby cooed at Sam, and Sam kissed her tiny nose.

And _no_, Dean was _so not_ thinking about how perfect Sam looked with Gabriel pressed up next to her and an adorable baby cradled in her arms.

Dean cleared his throat (_not_ because he was tearing up about it), and grinned. "So, what are you guys naming the little squirt?"

Sam and Gabriel looked at each other, a brief flash in their eyes, before turning back to Dean. "Her name's Sekiel Mary Winchester."

* * *

**A/N And.. that's the end of that! Review if you want more Sabriel and Destiel fluffiness! :) **_~Sammy_


	2. Fine to climb a mountain

**A/N Right. So, obviously, when I say that I'll try to get out more chapters, I don't generally mean that I'll do it after ****_three whole months_****. Problem is, I've got a ****_lot_**** of WIPs** **that I can only update when I have time, because they're not my top priority in the whole posting schedule. I'd rather work on one-shots and my main stories. That said, I did really love the idea for this fic, and I was always planning to continue it. It might be ages before I can update it again with a new chapter, but I promise that it'll happen.**

**Here's how this is going to work. This starts off post 8x23, and it's pretty much going to be much more detailed account of everything that's going down in chapter one, with more backstory and explanations. This chapter is set a couple of months after ****_Sacrifice_****. I'm not giving anything more away now. Enjoy! :) **_~Sammy_

* * *

**_Fine to climb a mountain_**

"Are you _sure_ that you're alright?"

"_Yes_, Dean. I'm fine."

"Cause if you're not then we can just head back and-"

"_Dean_. I'm fine, okay?"

"Yeah. I'm sure you are Sammy. 'Cause being thrown into a freaking headstone by a pissed off ghost is just _so_ beneficial to your health, right?"

Sam rolled her eyes and prayed (as useless as that was nowadays) for patience. "You already tested for a concussion, Dean. I'm okay. Bruised, but okay."

Dean huffed out a breath. "Yeah, but, that doesn't mean that we've gotta go to a bar. We've got beer at the bunker, if you want to celebrate a successful hunt or whatever the hell this is. Can't we just drive back?"

Sam slammed the trunk shut and turned to her brother, and incredulous look plastered across her face. "Wait, hold on a sec. _You _don't want to go to a _bar_. _You_?"

Dean shifted, and his expression was twisted into an uncomfortable grimace. "Well, we said we'd be back soon, and Kevin might have something new, and Cas'll be worried if we get back late and you know how much he worries, and-"

"Dean." Sam cut through her brother's rambling. "We said we'd be back when we were done working, Kevin said he'd call if he found anything, and Cas-"

Sam paused for a moment, and stared at Dean for half a second before suddenly bursting into laughter. "Oh God. This is about Cas, isn't it? You're _worried_."

Dean looked, if possible, even _more _uncomfortable. "'Course I'm worried. The guy's only been human for a couple of months now; he's still pretty much hopeless at everything. What if there's an emergency and he can't contact us. What if he burns down my kitchen?"

"Just shut up, would you? Cas knows not to burn down your kitchen. He doesn't have a freaking death wish. Besides, I talked to him, and he was the one who suggested that we go hit up a bar. He was saying something about translating a Persian text and not wanting to be disturbed."

Dean still looked ready to protest, so Sam pulled out her final resort. _Puppy-dog eyes time_. "Come _on_, Dean. I haven't been anywhere except the bunker in _months_. You put me on lockdown as soon as we got back. I'm _bored_. Please?"

Let it never be put down on record that Dean Winchester was a sucker for his little sister's puppy-dog eyes, but Sam swore that he was smiling a bit as he slid behind the wheel amid half-hearted grumbles.

The bar was a familiar sight of low voices, whiskey stained wooden bars, and the occasional crack and rattle of the pool table scattered around the warm room; and Dean almost melted into his jacket. He practically _bounced_ over to the bar, and somehow charmed a couple of beers and a slip of paper that was definitely decorated with a phone number off of the very flattered bartender. Sam couldn't hold back the smirk, and Dean shot her a playful glare, and smacked her lightly across the back of her head. Of course, it wasn't so much a smack as his fingers simply brushing against her hair; Dean was nothing but gentle for the past couple of months. Sam pulled a beer out of Dean's hand, ignoring her brother's disapproving huff.

_("Woah. No beer for you, Sammy." _

_"But I'm okay now." _

_"Yeah, well you're also two steps away from passing out, so let's lay back on the alcohol for now, okay?" _

_"I'm _thirty_, Dean, I can handle a damn beer." _

_"Sam, you were freaking _dying_ two weeks ago." _

_"…" _

_"Just, humor me, okay?" _

_"_Fine_." _

_"Sam…" _

_"I said fine, Dean, let it go.")_

She took a small sip before sighing and picking at the label, tracing patterns through the condensation on the bottle. Sam watched as Dean easily slipped his way into a game with nothing more than a self-deprecating smile and a few cocky words. He turned back when nobody was watching, and gave Sam a big over-emphasized grin (because that's what Sam expected from him). Sam rolled her eyes (because that's what Dean expected from her) and went back to tearing the beer label to shreds.

Sam played with a strip of the torn label, the paper sliding through her fingers, and she had to hold back a grimace at how skeletal her hand looked (_"But it's better than it was Sammy. You'll get better, I promise. I'll find a way to fix this."_). An itch slowly inched its way up her throat, and before she knew what was happening, a coughing fit overtook her, clawing its way through her chest, air scraping against her lungs in all the wrong ways. _At least there's no blood this time_.

Dean was looking over, worry flooding his features, pool game forgotten. Sam waited until breathing no longer felt like being force fed woodchips before looking up and giving Dean the best smile she could muster up, no matter how weak and watery it was. He took half a step towards her, but she shook her head and waved him back to the table. She was alright, no need for her mama-bear big brother to freak out.

Sam glared at Dean until he turned back to the pool table, once again falling back into his happy banter; but she could feel his gaze burn into her back every few minutes, and she sighed again.

She took another sip of her now-warm beer and hummed to herself, some random tune she'd heard over and over from the Impala's stereo. It was a slow song, soft and comforting.

"I'd forgotten how much I liked your voice, kiddo."

Sam twisted around (too fast, she was still a bit dizzy) and simply stared.

Finally, she gasped out a reply, "_Gabriel._ You're supposed to be dead."

* * *

**A/N Hey. C'mon. You started this story ****_knowing_**** that Gabriel was gonna show up. So ****_techincally_****, this ain't a cliffhanger. Right? Let me know what you thought! More updates in the near or distant future! (FYI- ****_Reviews will probably make it quicker.)_**** Smile. :) **~sammy


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